


Untitled (Zombie) Goose Game

by K_Popsicle



Category: Untitled Goose Game (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Zombies, Fighting a Goose, The Goose Wins, Unhappy Ending for the Humans, Violence, Zombies, church, villagers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-03
Updated: 2019-11-03
Packaged: 2021-01-20 22:34:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 550
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21289265
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/K_Popsicle/pseuds/K_Popsicle
Summary: Zombie Goose
Comments: 2
Kudos: 27
Collections: Trick or Treat Exchange 2019





	Untitled (Zombie) Goose Game

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Meatball42](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Meatball42/gifts).

> I have never played this game. Names are made up. Clearly. I was writing this before anyone said anything but you opted in.

“This is it.” Farmer Mike says pitchfork in hand. The villagers rally behind him, rakes, brooms, and umbrellas at the ready. They have been cornered at the local church, only the stained-glass windows keeping back the menace.

“Can’t we just- stay here forever?” Baker Annie asks, flour on her apron.

“And eat what, Annie? Eucharist and wine?” Painter Elton snaps.

Annie’s lip wobbles but she says, “Well, yes.”

“It’ll run out.” Painter Elton snaps again.

“But for now!” Annie will miss bread, but anything is better than stepping outside.

“No.” Farmer Mike says, hands flexing around the wooden handle of his weapon. “We fight or we die like cowards.” He stands tall, facing down the church aisle at the double wooden doors, doors they have carefully, quietly un-barricaded just for this. “Are you ready?” He shouts to the crowd of local villagers, and some of the grumble a yes, and some shout. Even Annie nods. It is enough. “Then lets-“ Farmer Mike calls, “-charge!” And he starts to run, and the villagers are behind him, beside him. He pushes the door open with his shoulder, he sees Pastor John sprint past in his robes a bible raised to attack, he sees Pharmacist Gwen in big pink gloves with a determined expression, he sees so many of them fly past and then he’s with them running at the goose standing on the lawn looking at them in defiance.

“Kill it! Kill it!” Painter Elton screams, lunging in ahead of the fray and the goose hops back a step, wings spread, Painter Elton falls, and the goose hisses and lunges at the fallen man. It’s tomia sink into and breaking his skin. Painter Elton stills and the goose is nearly hit from its left by Old Woman Barbara but it honks loudly and evades.

As the goose snaps at Baker Annie, tears on her face, Painter Elton starts to move again.

“No.” Farmer Mike chants, “No no no!” He cries, he tries to get into the crowd, all of them jostling to get in range of the plodding goose without getting in range of its cunning jaw, but it lands bite after bite, hissing and honking at them all with no fear or repentance.

“Back fowl beats!” Pastor John cries, bringing his bible down in a vicious swing. The goose bumbled between his legs and bites him on the rump. There’s a yelp, and then Pastor John is also down.

And that's when Painter Elton gets to his feet, face blank, docile and stumbles towards Lady Margaret who doesn’t seem sure what to do, but is trying frightfully hard to do something. She looks relieved, but then horrified as Painter Elton bites through her sleeve into her shoulder.

And Farmer Mikes knows, they’ve made a mistake, they should have listened to Annie. Annie whose fending off the Goose with a baguette, stumbling backwards with each step. “Retreat!” He calls, but already the villagers who were bitten are overwhelming those who remain. Farmer Mike watches as his village succumbs to the infection of one lone goose, and waits when it turns to him wings spread for the fate that awaits him.

The bite does not hurt, and all he hears as he closes his eyes is the raucous honking of a pleased goose.


End file.
